questions:

"Now, Sammy Smith, where was the Declaration of Independence signed?"

Sammy, with a shout of glee: "At de bottom, ma'am--that's what you
said!"



_He Had Certainly Met Him_

A traveler going to New Zealand was asked by a friend if he would
inquire, while there, as to the whereabouts of the friend's
grandfather, Jeremiah Thompson.

"Certainly," said the traveler, and wherever he went he asked for news
of the ancestor, but without avail.

One day he was introduced to a fine old Maori of advanced age. "Did
you ever meet with an Englishman named Jeremiah Thompson?" he asked.

A smile passed over the Maori's face. "Meet him?" he repeated. "Why,
I ate him!"



_No Place Like Home_

A Bostonian died, and when he arrived at St. Peter's gate he was asked
the usual questions: