***

A Bromley gentleman is advertising for a chauffeur "to drive Ford car out
of cab-yard." Kindness is a great thing in cases of this sort, and we
suggest trying to entice it out with a piece of cheese.

***

"You have lost the privilege of serving on the last grand jury during the
War," said the judge at the London Sessions last week to a shipowner who
arrived at the court late. We understand that the poor fellow broke down
and sobbed bitterly.

***

Nearly every Russian newspaper contains congratulatory references to Free
Russia, and poets are busy composing verses on the same theme. It is this
latter item which is said to be keeping the Germans from having a similar
revolution.

***

We understand that the new "No Smoking near Magazines" enactment is
profoundly resented in editorial circles.

***

To fill the gap which will be left in the ranks of Parliamentary humorists
by the retirement of Mr. JOSEPH KING, M.P., who has decided not to seek
re-election, the Variety Artistes Federation have nominated a candidate for