"_Perdidi animi deliquium_," said she.

"Mother of MOSES, but you was heavy!" said MCFLYNN.

But she did not wait, and a pair of number eight shoes might have been
seen by an inquisitive reporter, cutting around the corners and stamping
up seven flights of stairs.

MORAL.

When the paternal turnip solemnly points to 10-1/2, G.F.F.F.S. puts her
number eights on the mantel, looks reflectively at a sore-eyed kitten,
and falls into polysyllables.

* * * * *

HOMODEIFICATION.

Late advices from China convey the intelligence that the
American-Chinese General WARD, who died in the service of the Celestial
empire, has been postmortuarily brevetted to the rank of a "major god,"
and is now regularly worshipped as such by JOHN PIGTAIL.

Possibly the antithesis to this may turn up on the cards, here. In the
course of events the bronze idol to which our PHILLIPSES and SUMNERS
used to bend the knee, has been prostrated from his pedestal by the
Fifteenth Amendment. Coolie labor, with its possible abuses, may engage
the attention of the philanthropists, next, and we may yet behold JOHN
PIGTAIL on a pedestal, in the character of an American "major god."