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Punchinello, Volume 2, No. 34, November 19, 1870 by Various
page 17 of 69 (24%)
and, in fact, help to fill out a good article; but MELISSA most
vigorously denied the soft impeachment. Then she saw the sad wives,
whose days of sunshine are gone by, and the merry ones,--who don the cap
and bells deliberately; and for their benefit she expended just the
proper degree of astonishment and sympathy--so fully substantiating the
sound and praiseworthy condition of her own mind and heart.

This excellent young woman also caught glimpses of the red man, and here
was another glorious opportunity to display her literary genius--and she
did not let the occasion slip--O no! it produced a plaintive little
rhapsody of pity and regret, such as "Mr. Lo!" is apt to inspire in the
hearts of the young and romantic, although if MELISSA were to find
herself alone in a forest, with the faintest suspicion of "Mr. Lo!"
meandering anywhere near, she would most likely apply her hand
involuntarily to her trembling chignon, and regret as keenly as all
_hard-hearted_ persons, that civilization has not carried out the
process of extermination even more thoroughly than it has done. Indeed,
she would probably wish the red gentleman at the bottom of the Red Sea,
or in some other equally damp and discouraging situation. The
noble-hearted braves are so much prettier to read about than to
encounter, and the thrill occasioned by the sight of a bloody hatchet
suspended over the intricate elaboration which we so fondly term a head,
though more exciting perhaps, would scarcely be as delightful as that
awakened by some perfectly safe and stirring ballad of the red man's
wrongs.

MELISSA'S ideas of refinement met with a great shock. She concluded that
the Indians' acquaintance with soap and water must be extremely limited,
and thought that the distribution amongst them of several boxes of
COLGATE'S best would be a most delicate courtesy, and true missionary
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