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Diary of a Nobody by George Grossmith;Weedon Grossmith
page 33 of 154 (21%)
robbery. He said: "If you wanted your shirt-fronts made out of
pauper-linen, such as is used for packing and bookbinding, why
didn't you say so?"

June 7.--A dreadful annoyance. Met Mr. Franching, who lives at
Peckham, and who is a great swell in his way. I ventured to ask
him to come home to meat-tea, and take pot-luck. I did not think
he would accept such a humble invitation; but he did, saying, in a
most friendly way, he would rather "peck" with us than by himself.
I said: "We had better get into this blue 'bus." He replied: "No
blue-bussing for me. I have had enough of the blues lately. I
lost a cool 'thou' over the Copper Scare. Step in here."

We drove up home in style, in a hansom-cab, and I knocked three
times at the front door without getting an answer. I saw Carrie,
through the panels of ground-glass (with stars), rushing upstairs.
I told Mr. Franching to wait at the door while I went round to the
side. There I saw the grocer's boy actually picking off the paint
on the door, which had formed into blisters. No time to reprove
him; so went round and effected an entrance through the kitchen
window. I let in Mr. Franching, and showed him into the drawing-
room. I went upstairs to Carrie, who was changing her dress, and
told her I had persuaded Mr. Franching to come home. She replied:
"How can you do such a thing? You know it's Sarah's holiday, and
there's not a thing in the house, the cold mutton having turned
with the hot weather."

Eventually Carrie, like a good creature as she is, slipped down,
washed up the teacups, and laid the cloth, and I gave Franching our
views of Japan to look at while I ran round to the butcher's to get
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