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Sermons on Evil-Speaking by Isaac Barrow
page 77 of 130 (59%)
and unavoidable; that we are conscious and sensible of our own
obnoxiousness to the like slips or falls, and do consider that we
also may be tempted, and being tempted, may be overborne. This they
cannot perceive or be persuaded of, except we temper our speech with
benignity and mildness. Such speech prudence also dictateth, as
most useful and hopeful for producing the good ends honest
reprehension doth aim at; it mollifieth and it melteth a stubborn
heart, it subdueth and winneth a perverse will, it healeth
distempered affections. Whereas roughly handling is apt to defeat
or obstruct the cure: rubbing the sore doth tend to exasperate and
inflame it. Harsh speech rendereth advice odious and unsavoury;
driveth from it and depriveth it of efficacy; it turneth regret for
a fault into displeasure and disdain against the reprover; it looks
not like the dealing of a kind friend, but like the persecution of a
spiteful enemy; it seemeth rather an ebullition of gall, or a
defluxion from rancour, than an expression of good-will; the
offender will take it for a needless and pitiless tormenting, or for
a proud and tyrannical domineering over him. He that can bear a
friendly touch, will not endure to be lashed with angry and
reproachful words. In fine, all reproof ought to be seasoned with
discretion, with candour, with moderation, and meekness.

Fourthly, likewise in defence of truth, and maintenance of a good
cause, we may observe that commonly the fairest language is most
proper and advantageous, and that reproachful or foul terms are most
improper and prejudicial. A calm and meek way of discoursing doth
much advantage a good cause, as arguing the patron thereof to have
confidence in the cause itself, and to rely upon his strength: that
he is in a temper fit to apprehend it himself, and to maintain it;
that he propoundeth it as a friend, wishing the hearer for his own
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