which has appeared to turn up in the direction of Divine Providence, has
not answered my expectation, or on deliberate consideration it has not
seemed prudent for me to step into it, I have sometimes felt greatly
discouraged, and been ready to conclude, How could this thing be ordered
under the direction of best wisdom! But let me ever remember, He who has
his way in the whirlwind knows what is best for us; and were it not for
these incitements to an exercise of feeling, the mind would be apt to lie
dormant, and not be preserved alive in a proper state to prove all things
and hold fast that which is best.


About the end of the year he was obliged to spend several days in London
on business. The course of his affairs seems to have been uneven, and the
great city was probably uncongenial to his retired habits. He says:--


12 _mo_. 15.--I do not remember that my feelings were ever more
discouraging, both inwardly and outwardly. When the mind is ruffled about
the things of time, it is hard work to make any progress towards the land
of peace. I try to get to the well of water; but truly it may be said I
have nothing to draw with.


Yet even under these circumstances his daily religious practices--those
which no competitor for the meed of peace and the crown of glory can
dispense with--were not without avail.


16_th_.--In reading and retirement before I left my room, I received
a little hope that I should be preserved in a good degree of patience