acceptances to provide for, with nothing towards them but what was in the
uncertainty of the drapers' hands. When I have set out on a journey I have
had to take the distressing fear along with me, that if I failed of
getting in almost every shilling that was due to me, I failed in paying my
acceptances. Add to this, the painful prospect of losing my property until
I could not pay my just debts, and then mention a situation which would
place an honest mind in a greater degree of perplexity. O! had it not been
for the preserving hand of my gracious Redeemer, I had never lifted up my
head above the waters which were ready to overwhelm me. In the midst of
all this I received a firm conviction, that if I wound up as speedily as
circumstances would admit, I should measurably be safe; but if I suffered
the impression to pass away disregarded, I might be hurled along with the
stream and never more be able to recover myself. It seemed as if my eye
was fixed on a star which shone quite on the other side of the [waters];
and I was thus enabled to wade through, without, knowing what course to
take when I got to the other side. I do not mention this as being in the
whole applicable to thy case; but as a fellow Christian traveller towards
the celestial city, I earnestly intreat thee, in the love of the gospel,
never to consider thyself on a level, or at liberty to act in full scope,
with the man of business, who thinks himself created to pursue the things
of time without being responsible to his Creator for endeavoring to reach
a situation in life which would enable him to prepare for eternity. Thou
wilt not be long at a loss what to do if thou dost not overlook the secret
motive in thy own breast. Do not grieve at losing a little of what thou
hast; it will come again, if for the best, and may bring the double reward
of peace. If thou attendest to that directing Hand which has hitherto
preserved thee as a monument of thy Heavenly Father's mercy, thy victory
is already sure, though thou mayst not know it. It is not for the test,
consequently not permitted, that we should always see our way. Were this
the case there would be no exercise of faith. The servant of the prophet