ever had. When the widder-woman next-door but two and me 'ad rheumatics
at the same time, she went and asked the doctor whether it was catching.

"The worse trouble o' that kind I ever got into was all through trying to
do somebody else a kindness. I went out o' my way to do it; I wasted the
whole evening for the sake of other people, and got into such trouble
over it that even now it gives me the cold shivers to think of.

"Cap'n Tarbell was the man I tried to do a good turn to; a man what used
to be master of a ketch called the _Lizzie and Annie,_ trading between
'ere and Shoremouth. 'Artful Jack' he used to be called, and if ever a
man deserved the name, he did. A widder-man of about fifty, and as silly
as a boy of fifteen. He 'ad been talking of getting married agin for
over ten years, and, thinking it was only talk, I didn't give 'im any
good advice. Then he told me one night that 'e was keeping company with
a woman named Lamb, who lived at a place near Shoremouth. When I asked
'im what she looked like, he said that she had a good 'art, and, knowing
wot that meant, I wasn't at all surprised when he told me some time arter
that 'e had been a silly fool.

"'Well, if she's got a good 'art,' I ses, 'p'r'aps she'll let you go.'

"'Talk sense,' he ses. 'It ain't good enough for that. Why, she
worships the ground I tread on. She thinks there is nobody like me in
the whole wide world.'

"'Let's 'ope she'll think so arter you're married,' I ses, trying to
cheer him up.

"'I'm not going to get married,' he ses. 'Leastways, not to 'er. But