***

CHARLIE CHAPLIN says a gossip writer is coming to England in the Autumn.
This disposes of the suggestion that arrangements were being made for
England to be taken over to him.

***

_Incidentally_ we notice that CHARLIE CHAPLIN has become a naturalised
American, with, we presume, permission to use the rank of Honorary
Britisher.

***

Before a Northern Tribunal an applicant stated that he was engaged in
the completion of an invention which would enable dumb people to speak
or signal with perfection. He was advised, however, to concentrate for a
while on making certain Germans say "Kamerad."

***

An Isle of Wight man has succeeded in growing a vegetable marrow which
weighs forty-three pounds. To avoid its being mistaken for the island he
has scratched his name and address on it.

***

Those in search of a tactless present will bear in mind that Mr. MARK
HAMBOURG has written a book entitled "How to Play the Piano."