From an order recently issued at the Front:

"Great care must always be exercised in tethering horses to
trees, as they are apt to bark, and thereby destroy the trees."

Wow, wow!

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE PERFECT LIFE.

"YES, GAFFER. ME AN' MY OLE WOMAN 'ERE 'AVE LIVED TOGETHER THESE
FORTY YEAR, AN' NEVER 'AD A QUARREL--FORTY YEAR, MIND YER, AN'
NEVER BIN BEFORE THE MAGISTRATE!"]

* * * * *

SIGNS OF INNS.

The Herald lives in cloister grey;
He lives by clerkly rules;
He dreams in coats and colours gay,
In _argent_, _or_ and _gules_;
He blazons knightly shield and banner
In dim monastic hall,
And in a grave and reverend manner
He earns his bread withal.

Were I a herald fair and fit
So featly for to limn