alone.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Lady farm-help, being shown her new duties, notices
fowls having dust-bath._ "DEAR ME! I EXPECT THEY'LL WANT WASHING EVERY
NIGHT BEFORE I PUT THEM TO ROOST. I'D NO IDEA FOWLS WERE SUCH DIRTY
THINGS."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Aunty (wishing to be sympathetic)_. "I'M GLAD TO HEAR
YOU'VE GOT YOUR SEA-LEGS, JACK, AND I HOPE YOUR FRIEND IS GETTING ON
EQUALLY WELL AND HAS GOT HIS TRENCH-FEET."]

* * * * *

PURE ENGLISH.

[A writer in _The Daily Express_ has been discussing the
questions where and by whom the purest English is spoken
and written, and pronounces strongly in favour of East
Anglia, FITZGERALD, BORROW and Mr. CONRAD.]

Once more 'tis discussed
What guides we should trust
If we wish to write prose to perfection;
Is it BORROW or "FITZ,"
_The Times_ or _Tit Bits_?
And how should we make our selection?