"NO WAITING HERE!

"Good-morning! Have you worshipped one of Ti Hung's refined
ninety-nine cash idols?

"Let the purchasers of ill-constructed idols at other
establishments, where they have grown old and venerable while
waiting for the all-thumb proprietors to count up to ten, come to
the shop of Ti Hung and regain their lost youth. Our ninety-nine
cash idols are worth a tael a set. We do not, however, claim that
they will do everything. The ninety-nine cash idols of Ti Hung
will not, for example, purify linen, but even the most contented
and frozen-brained person cannot be happy until he possesses one.
What is happiness? The exceedingly well-educated Philosopher
defines it as the accomplishment of all our desires. Everyone
desires one of the Ti Hung's ninety-nine cash idols, therefore get
one; but be sure that it is Ti Hung's.

"Have you a bad idol? If so, dismiss it, and get one of Ti Hung's
ninety-nine cash specimens.

"Why does your idol look old sooner than your neighbours? Because
yours is not one of Ti Hung's ninety-nine cash marvels.

"They bring all delights to the old and the young,
The elegant idols supplied by Ti Hung.

"N.B.--The 'Great Sacrifice' idol, forty-five cash; delivered,
carriage free, in quantities of not less than twelve, at any
temple, on the evening before the sacrifice.