statement.

* * * * *

SUAVITER IN MODO.

Profound stillness reigned in the wardroom of H.M.S. _Sinister_,
broken only by the low tones of the Paymaster and the First Lieutenant
disputing over the question of proportional representation and by
the snores of the Junior Watchkeeper, stretched inelegantly on the
sofa. The rest of the occupants were in the coma induced by all-night
coaling. Into this haven of quiet burst the ship's Doctor in a state
of exaggerated despair. He groaned and, sinking into a chair, mopped
his forehead ostentatiously. The disputants ceased their discussion
and watched him intently as though he were some performing animal.

"Gentlemen," said the Paymaster presently in tones of sepulchral
gloom, "the neophyte of ÆSCULAPIUS, to whose care the inscrutable
wisdom of Providence has entrusted our lives, is being excruciatingly
funny. Number One says it is belated remorse for the gallant servants
of His Majesty whom he has consigned to an untimely grave."

"Poor jesting fool," said his victim, "little he knows that even now
Heaven has prepared a punishment fitted even to his crimes. I have
seen it--nay, I have spoken with it."

"Suppose," intervened the Commander, "that you postpone this contest
of wits and let us have your news."

"Certainly, Sir," acquiesced the Doctor. "It's Pay's new assistant.