lay bare my inmost thoughts about the League of Nations while someone
is running a miniature mowing-machine along the back of my neck ...

At this moment my wife entered the room.

"My dear," I said, "I am going to get my hair cut."

She gave me one mind-piercing look and said, "It's time you did. I've
been noticing it for the last day or two."

Nothing, you see, about convicts. Isn't that like a woman, never to
say the thing you expect her to say? It's taken all the pleasure out
of my visit to the barber. In fact I don't think I shall go at all.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE ENFRANCHISEMENT OF WOMAN.

_First Voter_. "SO MR. JONES HAS BEEN ELECTED. YOU VOTED FOR HIM, OF
COURSE?"

_Second Voter_. "NO, I VOTED FOR THE OTHER MAN. YOU SEE, MR. JONES
SUPPORTED WOMAN'S SUFFRAGE, WHICH I ABHOR."]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

_(BY MR. PUNCH'S STAFF OF LEARNED CLERICS.)_