Englishman of the present century to any marked degree. The Englishman,
aping the reserve and hauteur of Boston, Massachusetts, is, in fact, the
diametrical antipode of the impulsive, warm-hearted, and garlic-imbued
Roman who revels in assassination and gold ear-bobs.

The beautiful daughter of Hengist formed an alliance with Vortigern, the
royal foreman of Great Britain,--a plain man who was very popular in the
alcoholic set and generally subject to violent lucid intervals which
lasted until after breakfast; but the Saxons broke these up, it is said,
and Rowena encouraged him in his efforts to become his own worst enemy,
and after two or three patent-pails-full of wassail would get him to
give her another county or two, until soon the Briton saw that the Saxon
had a mortgage on the throne, and after it was too late, he said that
immigration should have been restricted.

[Illustration: ROWENA CAPTIVATES VORTIGERN.]

Kent became the first Saxon kingdom, and remained a powerful state for
over a century.

More Saxons now came, and brought with them yet other Saxons with yet
more children, dogs, vodka, and thirst. The breath of a Saxon in a
cucumber-patch would make a peck of pickles per moment.

The Angles now came also and registered at the leading hotels. They were
destined to introduce the hyphen on English soil, and plant the orchards
on whose ancestral branches should ultimately hang the Anglo-Saxon race,
the progenitors of the eminent aristocracy of America.

Let the haughty, purse-proud American--in whose warm life current one