mother of the maids at length, a poor kinswoman, or a crackt
chambermaid, to have and to hold during the time of his
life."--Burton, _Anat. of Mel._ part i. sect. 2. mem. 3. subsect 15.

Burton is here referrng to the _Euphormionis Lusinini Satyricon_,
published anno 1617. It professes to be a satire, or rather A FURIOUS
INVECTIVE, on the corrupt manners of the times, and is in four parts:
the 1st is dedicated to King James I.; the 2nd to Robert Cecil; the 3rd
to Charles Emmanuel of Savoy; the 4th to Louis XIII., King of France.

The use that Burton makes of the name of Euphormio is any thing but
happy. He was not a "_trencher chaplain_" but the slave of a rich
debauchée, Callion, sent in company with another slave, Percas, to carry
some all-potent nostrum to Fibullius, a friend of Callion, who was
suffering from an attack of stone. Euphormio cures Fibullius, not by the
drug with which he was armed, but by a herb, which he sought for and
found on a mountain. Fibullius, to reward his benefactor, offers him as
a wife a most beautiful girl, whom he introduces to him privately while
in his sick room. Euphormio looks with no little suspicion on the offer;
but, after a few excuses, which are overruled by Fibullius, accepts the
lady as his betrothed, "seals the bargain with a holy kiss," and walks
out of the room (to use his own words) "et sponsus, et quod
nesciebam--Pater," page 100. The next mention of this lady [evidently
the prototype of the "crackt chambermaid,"] is in page 138. Callion had
paid his sick friend Fibullius a visit, and, on the eve of his
departure, had ordered Euphormio to ride post before him, and prepare
the inhabitants of the districts through which he was to pass for his
arrival. While Euphormio is on the horseblock in the act of mounting his
steed, a rustic brings him a letter from Fibullius, and in conversation
gives him such an account of his bride as forces upon him the