'Even if I had known it all beforehand I don't think I could have acted
differently. I could not have married him. Indeed I couldn't, Julia, not
even if I knew I should save his life by doing so. I daresay it is very
wicked of me, but----'

'Dearest Emily, you must not give way to such thoughts; you did quite right
in refusing to marry Mr. Burnett. It was very wrong of him even to think of
asking you, and if he had lived he would have seen how wrong it was of him
to desire such a thing.'

'If he had lived! But then he didn't live, not even long enough to forgive
me, and when we think of how much he suffered--I don't mean in dying, you
say he passed away quietly, but all this last month how heart-broken he
looked! You remember when he sat at the head of the table, never speaking
to us, and how frightened I was lest I should meet him on the stairs; I
used to stand at the door of my room, afraid to move. I know he suffered,
poor old man. I was very, very sorry for him. Indeed I was, Julia, for I'm
not selfish, and when I think now that he died without forgiving me, I
feel, I feel--oh, I feel as if I should like to die myself. Why do such
things happen to me? I feel just as miserable now as I used to when I lived
with father and mother, who could not agree. I have often told you how
miserable I was then, but I don't think you ever quite understood. I feel
just the same now, just as if I never wanted to see any one or anything
again. I was so unhappy when I was a child, they thought I would die, and I
should have died if I had remained listening to father and mother any
longer. ... Every one thought I was so lucky when Mr. Burnett decided to
adopt me and leave me all his money, and he has done that, poor old man, so
I suppose I should be happy; but I'm not.'

The girl's eyes turned instinctively towards the window and rested for a