ash-heap." PATLANDER.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Aunt Maria_. "DO YOU KNOW I ONCE ACTUALLY SAW THE
KAISER RIDING THROUGH THE STREETS OF LONDON AS BOLD AS BRASS. IF I'D
KNOWN THEN WHAT I KNOW NOW I'D HAVE TOLD A POLICEMAN."]

* * * * *

"FOR THE DURATION ..."

"The forenoon service in the Parish Church will be at 11 o'clock
instead of 11.15 on Sunday first, and will continue till further
orders."--_Scottish Paper_.

* * * * *

AID FOR THE MILITARY POLICE.

"The recruiting hut which is being erected in Trafalgar Square in
connection with the campaign undertaken by the Ministry of Labour
to recruit women for the Women's Army Auxiliary Cops will shortly
be completed."--_Sunday Pictorial_.

* * * * *

"She was visited occasionally by a man of foreign appearance, who
was believed to be her bother-in-law."--_Ipswich Evening Star_.