PAYING OFF

My biggest fault, said the night-watchman, gloomily, has been good
nature. I've spent the best part of my life trying to do my fellow-
creeturs a good turn. And what do I get for it? If all the people I've
helped was to come 'ere now there wouldn't be standing room for them on
this wharf. 'Arf of them would be pushed overboard--and a good place for
'em, too.

I've been like it all my life. I was good-natured enough to go to sea as
a boy because a skipper took a fancy to me and wanted my 'elp, and when I
got older I was good-natured enough to get married. All my life I've
given 'elp and advice free, and only a day or two ago one of 'em wot I
'ad given it to came round here with her 'usband and 'er two brothers and
'er mother and two or three people from the same street, to see her give
me "wot for."

Another fault o' mine has been being sharp. Most people make mistakes,
and they can't bear to see anybody as don't. Over and over agin I have
showed people 'ow silly they 'ave been to do certain things, and told 'em
wot I should ha' done in their place, but I can't remember one that ever
gave me a "thank you" for it.

There was a man 'ere 'arf an hour ago that reminded me of both of these
faults. He came in a-purpose to remind me, and 'e brought a couple o'
grinning, brass-faced monkeys with 'im to see 'im do it. I was sitting
on that barrel when he came, and arter two minutes I felt as if I was