Captain A. and Captain B.,
The one was in F, the other in E,
The one was rheumatic and shrank from wet feet,
The other had sunstroke and dreaded the heat.

"If we could exchange," wrote B. to A.,
"We should both keep fitter (the doctors say),"
And, A. agreeing, they humbly prayed
The great War Office to lend its aid.

In less than a month they got replies,
A letter to each of the self-same size;
A.'s was: "Yes, you'll exchange with B.";
B.'s was: "No, you'll remain in E."

* * * * *

OUR MODEST PUBLICISTS.

"I felt it to be my duty to say that and I said it; and, of
course, nobody took any notice."--_Mr. Robert Blatchford, in
"The Sunday Chronicle."_

* * * * *

"CHRISTIANA, Thursday.

Several hours' violent cannonading was heard in the Skagerack.

Norwegian torpedoes proceeded thither to investigate."--_Toowoomba