due partly to a fear of being choked with bones, and partly to a scorn
of its tenderness. The physical weaknesses of students he attributes
entirely to their consuming so much of it. Viewed from his standpoint,
perhaps students are effeminate, for he possesses the strength of
brass, and an amount of endurance astonishing to contemplate.

His ordinary working-hours are from six in the morning till six at
night; but, when business presses, he rises, like the virtuous woman,
while it is yet night, and brings down on his devoted head the
anathemas of various students by commencing his day's sawing under
their windows at the moderately early hour of one A.M. He is a living
proof of the utter and irreclaimable falsity of the idiotic doggerel:

"Early to bed, and early to rise,
Makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise."

Last summer, however, during the heated term, he was obliged to come
down to the limit of ordinary mortals, as he feared that the influence
of the sun's rays would bring about a degeneration of the Ottah and
Verdigres in the brain, and result in an explosion of the blood-veins.
By careful sanitary precautions he was enabled to avoid this fearful
malady and preserve his physical well-being.

He can, and will, for the comparatively slight sum of twenty-five
cents, hold his breath for five minutes. He, himself, asserts that he
can do it for seven minutes, but that the doctor advised him against
doing so, as it might produce a fusion of the Ottahs.

His costume is at once serviceable and unique. It usually consists of
from two to five shirts, and three pairs of pantaloons. He never was