my half-sister; my only solace, the company of my father.

"'My dear child, he said to me once, it is not here as in Italy; our
women have no occupation save their domestic uses. Your talents may
beguile your solitude; but in a country town like this all that attracts
attention excites envy. One must not combat the habits of a place in
which one is established. It is better to bear a little ennui than to be
beset by wondering faces that every instant demand reasons for what you
do.'

"Lord Nevil was my father's intimate friend, and it was yourself of whom
he thought for my husband. Had we then met and loved, our fate would
have been cloudless. But when I was presented to Lord Nevil I desired,
perhaps too ardently, to please him; I displayed all my talents,
dancing, singing, and extemporising before him--I believe, though I am
not certain--that I appeared to Lord Nevil somewhat too wild; for
although he treated me very kindly, yet, when he left my father he said
that he thought his son too young for the marriage in question. Oswald,
what importance do you attach to this confession? I might suppress it,
but I will not. Is it possible that it will prove my condemnation?

"When my father died, my despair was uncontrollable. I found myself
without support. My only adult relation was my stepmother, who was as
frigid as ever towards me. I was attacked by that homesick yearning
which makes exile more terrible than death. All the country around me
was dull and sullen. I longed for the sunshine, the vine, the music, the
sweet language of Italy. At twenty-one I had a right to my mother's
fortune, and whatever my father had left me. Then did I first dream of
returning to Italy, and devoting my life to the arts.