Gentle Measures in the Management and Training of the Young - Or, the Principles on Which a Firm Parental Authority May Be - Established and Maintained, Without Violence or Anger, and the Right - Development of the Moral and Mental Capacities Be Promoted by Jacob Abbott
page 46 of 304 (15%)
page 46 of 304 (15%)
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_Suppose one is not at the Beginning_.
What has been said thus far relates obviously to cases where the mother is at the commencement of her work of training. This is the way to _begin_; but you can not begin unless you are at the beginning. If your children are partly grown, and you find that they are not under your command, the difficulty is much greater. The principles which should govern the management are the same, but they can not be applied by means so gentle. The prison, it may be, must now be somewhat more real, the terms of imprisonment somewhat longer, and there may be cases of insubordination so decided as to require the offender to be carried to it by force, on account of his refusal to go of his own accord, and perhaps to be held there, or even to be tied. Cases requiring treatment so decisive as this must be very rare with children under ten years of age; and when they occur, the mother has reason to feel great self-condemnation--or at least great self-abasement--at finding that she has failed so entirely in the first great moral duty of the mother, which is to train her children to complete submission to her authority from the beginning. _Children coming under New Control_. Sometimes, however, it happens that children are transferred from one charge to another, so that the one upon whom the duty of government devolves, perhaps only for a time, finds that the child or children put under his or her charge have been trained by previous mismanagement to habits of utter insubordination. I say, trained to such habits, for the practice of allowing children to gain their ends by any particular means is really training them to the use of those means. Thus multitudes of children are taught to disobey, and trained to habits of insubmission and insubordination, by the means most effectually adapted to that end. |
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