Mutual Vows


"My dear," he said, "observe this frightful bill,
Run up, I think you'll own, against my will.
If you will recollect our wedding day
You vowed on that occasion to obey."
"I do recall the day," said she, "and how
Me with your worldly goods you did endow."
"That," he replied, "is palpably absurd----"
"You mean you did not mean to keep your word?"
"O, yes," he answered, "in a general way."
"And that," said she, "is how I meant obey."




If They Meant All They Said


Charm is a woman's strongest arm;
My charwoman is full of charm;
I chose her, not for strength of arm
But for her strange elusive charm.

And how tears heighten woman's powers!
My typist weeps for hours and hours:
I took her for her weeping powers--
They so delight my business hours.