East End-Music Hall? If there is any truth in the rumour, I should
like to ask _what the Duchess has been about?_

* * * * *

A distinguished Oxford Mathematical Professor has, just after
prolonged and patient research, established the undoubted certainty
of the following interesting facts beyond any possible question or
controversy:--That the quantity of Almond Rock Hard Bake, consumed in
the United Kingdom in the year terminating on the 15th of May last,
amounted to 17 lbs. 9 oz. for each member of the population, including
women and children. That if at all the old and discarded Chimney Pot
Hats for a like period were collected in a heap, and packed closely
together, they would fill a building twice the height of St. Paul's,
and three times the length of the Crystal Palace. That winners of
the Derby who have become eventually four-wheeler cab-horses are
ninety-six in number, but that there is _only one authentic_ instance
of a four-wheeler cab-horse having become a Derby winner.

* * * * *

So great is the craze for the newest idea in locomotion that it is
calculated that including Duchesses no less than 1470 _grandes dames_
whose names are well-known in Society, now pass Piccadilly Circus on
the outside of the London General Omnibus Company's vehicles, between
the hours of 8 A.M. and 10 P.M. daily.

* * * * *

A PASSPORT TO THE BEST SOCIETY, AND A GUARANTEE FOR RESPECTABILITY,