More Fables by George Ade
page 22 of 81 (27%)
page 22 of 81 (27%)
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One morning the Colonel went into the Dining Room, and after he had
seated himself he called Mr. Winfield to him and said he wanted some Hot Biscuit. At the same time he addressed Mr. Winfield as a Black Hound. Mr. Winfield did not know that this was a Term of Endearment in Apahatchie County, so he picked up a Silver Fruit Dish and bounced it against the Colonel's Head. The Colonel arose and pulled his Persuader, expecting to make it a Case of Justifiable Homicide, but two Waiters named George and Grant grabbed him and backed him up against the Wall. There were other guests in the Dining Room, but they did not jump in with any Gun Plays and make it a Race War, because Apahatchie County was Eight Hundred Miles away. One of them Co-Operated to the extent of Ringing three times for a Policeman. The Officer of the Law who arrived in a few Minutes was Mr. Otis Beasley, Most Worshipful Scribe of the Princes of Ethiopia, of which Mr. Winfield was the Regal Commander. Mr. Beasley walked up to Mr. Winfield, and placing his Left Hand on his Brow, said, "Hail, Brother." "Hail, Most Noble Prince!" responded Mr. Winfield, making the Mystic Sign. "What are the Objects of our Beloved Fraternity?" asked Mr. Beasley, in a whisper. "Hope, Coslosterousness, and Polotomy," replied the Regal Commander. |
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