His Girth increased--he became puffy under the Eyes--you could see the
little blue Veins on his Nose.

He kept his Name out of the Papers as much as possible, and he never
gave Congress a Thought except when he talked to his Lawyer of the
Probable Manner in which they would Evade any Legislation against
Trusts. He took two Turkish Baths every week and wore Silk Underwear.
When an Eminent Politician would come to his Office to shake him down he
would send out Word by the Boy in Buttons that he had gone to Europe.
That's what he thought of Politics.

One day while rummaging in a lower Drawer in his Library, looking for a
Box of Poker Chips, he came upon a Roll of Manuscript and wondered what
it was. He opened it and read how it was the Duty of all True Americans
to hop into the Arena and struggle unselfishly for the General Good. It
came to him in a Flash--this was his High School Oration!

Then suddenly he remembered that for several Years of his Life his
consuming Ambition had been--to go to Congress!

With a demoniacal Shriek he threw himself at full length on a Leather
Couch and began to Laugh.

He rolled off the Sofa and tossed about on a $1,200 Rug in a Paroxysm of
Merriment.

His Man came running into the Library and saw the Master in Convulsions.
The poor Trust Magnate was purple in the Face.

They sent for a Great Specialist, who said that his Dear Friend had