"Don't be alarmed," said Mr. Cooper, reassuringly. "I wasn't born
yesterday. I don't want to get a crack over the head."

"It's all a mistake, Bob," said the prisoner, appealingly. "I just had
a shave and a haircut and--and a little hair-dye. If you open the door
you'll know me at once."

"How would it be," said Mr. Cooper, turning to his sister, and speaking
with unusual distinctness--"how would it be if you opened the door, and
just as he put his head out I hit it a crack with the poker?"

"You try it on," said the voice behind the door, hotly. "You know who I
am well enough, Bob Cooper. I don't want any more of your nonsense.
Milly has put you up to this!"

"If your wife don't know you, how do you think I can?" said Mr. Cooper.
"Now, look here; you keep quiet till my brother-in-law comes home. If
he don't come home perhaps we shall be more likely to think you're him.
If he's not home by to-morrow morning we--Hsh! Hsh! Don't you know
there's ladies present?"

"That settles it," said Mrs. Cooper, speaking for the first time. "My
brother-in-law would never talk like that."

"I should never forgive him if he did," said her husband, piously.

He poured himself out another glass of beer and resumed his supper with
relish. Conversation turned on the weather, and from that to the price
of potatoes. Frantic efforts on the part of the prisoner to join in the
conversation and give it a more personal turn were disregarded. Finally