"'All right," says he, brisk, 'to oblige you--remember that.' He
turned the dipper upside down, then heaved it through the window.
'Sufferin' Ike'' says he, "I can't even taste it--nothin' but cold,
cold. Went down my gullet like a buckshot down a ten-foot shaft.'
He struggled for air and continued; 'Here am I,' says he, 'William
Pemberton, celebratin' Christmas by dyeing my linin' green and
smellin' like a recess in a country school.' His ventilation give
out again, whilest he worked his face into knots and flew his hands
around. 'You come along with me,' says he, 'and I'll show you a
Christmas celebration.'

"I grabbed him. 'William,' I says, 'your eye is desperate. You
explain to me before you scuff a foot.'

"'Leggo me,' he says; 'I tell you, leggo me, Zeke Scraggs. I'm
goin' to have my revenge. I'm goin' to take ten cases of giant
powder and blow the mill of Honorable John Lawson Davis, Member of
Congress, Champion Double-Jointed, Ground-and-Lofty,
Collar-and-Elbow, Skin and Liar, so high in the air that folks'll
think there's a new comet, predictin' war and trouble.'

"'William,' I says 'you ain't goin' to do no such thing--that's
wicked, that is.' I tried to speak stern, but this here Christmas
hadn't amounted to much so far, and I never had seen a stamp mill
blew up, so I couldn't help wonderin' how it would look.

"'See here!' says he, 'I'll admit many a time you've licked me in a
friendly way, Ezekiel, and I'm obliged to you; but, now, be you, or
ben't you, my guest?'