Cobb's Anatomy by Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury) Cobb
page 50 of 58 (86%)
page 50 of 58 (86%)
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of William Faversham and throwing the coat lapels back, at the same
time resting the left hand clenched upon the upper thigh with the elbow well out--Donald Brian asking a lady to waltz--and offering the right hand to the favored female and telling her to go as far as she likes with it. It sounds simple when you figuring it out alone, but it rarely works out that way in practice. It is my belief that every woman longs for the novelty of a Turkish bath and every man for the novelty of a manicure long before either dares to tackle it. I may be wrong but this is my belief. And in the case of the man he usually makes a number of false starts. You go to the portals and hesitate and then, stumbling across the threshold, you either dive on through to the barber shop--if there is a barber shop in connection--or else you mumble something about being in a hurry and coming back again, and retreat with all the grace and ease that would be shown by a hard shell crab that was trying to back into the mouth of a milkbottle. You are likely to do this several times; but finally some day you stick. You slump down into one of those little chairs and offer your hands or one of them to a calm and slightly arrogant looking young lady and you tell her to please shine them up a little. You endeavor to appear as though you had been doing this at frequent periods stretching through a great number of years, but she--bless her little heart!-- she knows better than that. The female of the manicuring species is not to be deceived by any such cheap and transparent artifices. If you wore a peekaboo waist she couldn't see through you any easier. Your hands would give you away if your face didn't. In a sibulent aside, she addresses the young lady at the next table-- the one with the nine bracelets and the hair done up delicatessen store mode--sausages, rolls and buns--whereupon both of them laugh |
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