_Mrs. R._ Of course I know that any place where I don't happen to be
is cosier in _your_ opinion.

_Jack._ Oh, hang it, don't begin all that again--there, _I_'ll stay!
(_He chooses a comfortable chair._) What the doose is that?

[_The phonograph has begun to buzz and hum._

_Mrs. R._ Hush!--it's Uncle JOHN'S present.

[_The "Wedding March" strikes up with a deafening blare._

_Jack_ (_startled_). Bless my soul! I thought something had blown up.
"_Hallelujah Chorus_," is it--or what?

_Mrs. R._ (_coldly_). As it happens, it is MENDELSSOHN'S "_Wedding
March._"

_Jack._ Sounded familiar somehow. 'Jove! MENDELSSOHN was determined to
let 'em know _he_ was married!

_Mrs. R._ That was intended to let people know _we_ were married. It
is our Wedding March.

_Jack._ Ours? You said it was _MENDELSSOHN'S_ just now! But what are
you turning it on _now_, for?

_Mrs. R._ Do you remember what day this is, by any chance?

_Jack._ Haven't an idea. Isn't there a calendar on your