* * * * *

THE PROFESSIONAL GUEST.

ON A HOUSE-BOAT AT HENLEY.

DEAR MR. PUNCH,

When I received a wire from an old and dear school-friend,
saying, "LUCY disappointed; come for week; wire me, _Goldfields_,
Henley--KITTY," I felt that the Art which I had been so assiduously
cultivating for some time past was to be put in practice at last. I
had long decided that there was a grand opening for girls (the true
unemployed) in the idea, and I had determined to make a good thing
out of it myself. KITTY' S telegram was somewhat vague, I admit; but
gossip having thrown a side-light on it, I knew that it came from
Henley, where she and her husband (whom I had never yet seen) had a
House-boat for the Regatta week. To answer in the affirmative, pack
my box, and catch the next train to Henley, was small work to a
"Professional Guest."

[Illustration]

When I arrived, I walked straight out of the station to the nearest
wharf, and, chartering a punt, had my luggage and myself placed on
board, and then told the small boy, who "manned" the craft, to take me
to the _Goldfields_. I was not too well pleased when he threw doubts,
not only on her whereabouts, but on her existence. Neither the small
boy nor a big man, nor an old woman standing by, knew anything about
it; and I had determined to take the next train to Town, when a