of a werry emenent Amerrycane, who cums to Lundon wunce ewery year,
and makes a good long stay, and allus cums to one or other of our
Grand Otels. He says he's taken quite a fansy to me, and for this most
singler reason. He says as I'm the ony Englishman as he has ewer known
who can allus giv a answer rite off to ewery question as he arsks
me! So much so, that he says as how as I ort to be apinted the Guide,
Feelosofer, and Frend of ewery one of the many Wisiters as we allus
has a staying here!

Well, all I can say is, that if I affords the heminent Amerrycane
jest about harf the fun and emusement as he does me, I must be a much
cleverer feller than I ewer thort myself, or than my better harf
ewer told me as I was. Ah, wouldn't he jest make her stare a bit if
she herd sum of his most owdacious sayings. Why, he acshally says,
that the hole system of marrying for life is all a mistake, and not
consistent with our changable nature! And that we ort to take our
Wives on lease, as we does our houses, wiz., for sewen or fourteen
years, and that in a great majority of cases they woud both be preshus
glad when the end of the lease came! And he tries werry hard to make
me bleeve, tho in course he doesn't succeed, that in one part of
his grate and staggering Country, ewerybody does jest as he likes
in these rayther himportant matters, and has jest as many Wives as
he can afford to keep, and that the King of that place has about a
dozen of 'em! Ah, if you wants to hear a Teel downright staggerer as
nobody carnt posserbly bleeve, don't "ask the Pleaceman," but arsk an
Amerrycane!

He wanted werry much to go to Brighton, and see our new Grand
Metropole Otel opened last Satterday; so I spoke to our most
gentlemanly Manager, and he gave him a ticket that took him down