teaches. Before a dinner or luncheon party, the crammer spends
an hour or two with the pupil, and coaches her up in general
conversation.]

It really took us by surprise,
We thought her but a mere beginner,
And widely opened were our eyes
To hear her brilliant talk at dinner.
She always knew just what to say,
And said it well, nor for a minute
Was ever at a loss,--I may
As well confess--we men weren't in it!

The talk was of Roumania's Queen,
And was she equal, say, to DANTE?--
The way that race was won by _Sheen_,
And not the horse called _Alicánte_--
Of how some charities were frauds,
How some again were quite deserving--
The beauties of the Norfolk broads--
The latest hit of Mr. IRVING--

Does sap go up or down the stem?--
The Boom of Mr. RUDYARD KIPLING--
The speeches of the G.O.M.--
The strength of Mr. MORLEY's "stripling"
_Was_ JONAH swallowed by the whale?--
The price of jute--we wondered all if
They'd have the heart to send to gaol
Those heroes, SLAVIN and McAULIFFE.