worse--of it, puts them on again, and vanishes hurriedly._

_First Sardonic Attendant (at doorway_). Reg'lar turnin' em away
to-night, _we_ are!

_Second Sardonic Attendant_. He come up to me afore he goes to the
pay-box, and sez he--"Is there a seat left?" he sez. And I sez to
'im, "Well, I _think_ we can manage to squeeze you in somewhere." Like
that, I sez.

[_The Orchestra, consisting of two thin-armed little girls,
with pigtails, enter, and perform a stumbling Overture upon a
cracked piano_. Herr Von KAMBERWOHL, _the Conjuror, appears on
platform, amidst loud clapping from two obvious Confederates
in a back row._

_Herr V. K. (in a mixed accent)._ Lyties and Shentilmans, pefoor I
co-mence viz my hillusions zis hevenin', I 'ave, most hemphadically to
repoodiate hall hassistance from hany spirrids or soopernatural beins
vatsohever. All I shall 'ave ze honour of showing you will be perform
by simple Sloight of 'and, or Ledger-dee-Mang! (_He invites any member
of the Audience to step up and assist him, but the spectators remain
coy._) I see zat I 'ave not to-night so larsh an orjence to select
from as usual, still I 'ope----(_Here one of the obvious Confederates
slouches up, and joins him on the platform. _) Ah, zat is goot! I am
vair moch oblige to you, Sare. (_The Confederate grins sheepishly._)
Led me see--I seem to remember your face some'ow. (_Broader grin from
Confederate._) Hah, you vos 'ere last night?--zat exblains it! But you
'ave nevaire assist me befoor, eh? (_Reckless shake of the head from
Confederate._) I thought nod. _Vair_ veil. You 'ave nevaire done any