You Can Search Me by Hugh McHugh
page 16 of 74 (21%)
page 16 of 74 (21%)
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fray.
The committee of citizens attracted by the screams of the lawn-mower came over to see if I was killing a member of the family or only a distant relative. When they saw me boxing the ears of a stubborn lawn-mower they said my punishment was heavy enough, so they threw away the lynching rope and left me at the post. Clara J. came out on the porch and said, "John, perhaps that lawn-mower would stop screaming if you used a little axle grease!" "All right," I came back at her, "but it will take me an hour and a half to find out which part of the lawnmower will fit the axle grease." Then I lifted the machinery up to examine its constitution and by-laws, and about two and a half pounds of wrought iron fell off and landed on my instep. The wrought iron made good. Then I tried to stand on the other foot, but I lost my balance and fell on the lawn-mower's third rail. I never was so mortified in my life as when that lawn-mower began to saw its initials on my shin bones. Every time I tried to get up I lost my balance, and every time I |
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