out paddling their canoes on my alimentary canal.

By nine o'clock that morning there must have been eighty-five
million grip germs armed with self-loading revolvers all trying to
shoot their initials over the walls of my interior department.

It was fierce!

When the doctor arrived on the scene I was carrying enough
concealed weapons to exterminate the entire Japanese army.

I'm up to one thing and that is that the Russians couldn't beat the
Japs because all the national energy and vitality emigrated from
St. Petersburg and came over here with the first grip germs.

If the Czar of all the Russians had been a wise Little Father he
would have encouraged the grip germs to remain loyal to their
native land and then he could have sent them out to Manchuria to
bite the ramparts out of General Oyama instead of chasing
inoffensive American citizens into the drug stores.

"Well, anyway the medicine mixer blew in, threw his saws behind the
sofa, put his dip net on the mantlepiece, and took a fall out of my
pulse.

"Ah!" he said, after he had noted that my tongue looked like a
currycomb.

"The same to you, Doc," I said.