with a strange kind of passion; "What had I done," says he, "that such
an unhappy wretch should come into my ship? I would not set my foot in
the same ship with thee again for a thousand pounds." This indeed was,
as I said, an excursion of his spirits, which were yet agitated by the
sense of his loss, and was farther than he could have authority to go.
However, he afterwards talked very gravely to me, exhorted me to go back
to my father, and not tempt Providence to my ruin; told me I might see a
visible hand of Heaven against me. "And young man," said he, "depend
upon it, if you do not go back, wherever you go, you will meet with
nothing but disasters and disappointments, till your father's words are
fulfilled upon you."

We parted soon after; for I made him little answer, and I saw him no
more: which way he went, I know not. As for me, having some money in my
pocket, I travelled to London by land; and there, as well as on the
road, had many struggles with myself, what course of life I should take,
and whether I should go home, or go to sea.

As to going home, shame opposed the best motions that offered to my
thoughts; and it immediately occurred to me how I should be laughed at
among the neighbours, and should be ashamed to see, not my father and
mother only, but even every body else; from whence I have since often
observed, how incongruous and irrational the common temper of mankind
is, especially of youth, to that reason which ought to guide them in
such cases, viz. that they are not ashamed to sin, and yet are ashamed
to repent; nor ashamed of the action for which they ought justly to be
esteemed fools, but are ashamed of the returning, which only can make
them be esteemed wise men.

In this state of life however I remained some time, uncertain what