JOHN. What did they get their titles for?

TRANTO. Ask me another.

JOHN. Of course I don't want to be personal, but _how_ did they get
them? Did they--er--buy them?

TRANTO. Don't know.

JOHN. Haven't you ever asked them?

TRANTO. Well, John, you've got relatives yourself, and you probably know
there are some things that even the most affectionate relatives _don't_
ask each other.

HILDEGARDE (_rising from the desk and looking at John's feet_). Yes,
indeed! This very morning I unwisely asked Johnnie whether his socks
ever talked. Altercation followed. 'Some debate, believe _me_!'

JOHN (_rising; with scornful tranquillity_). I'd better get ready for
dinner. Besides, you two would doubtless like to be alone together for a
few precious moments.

HILDEGARDE (_sharply and self-consciously_). What do you mean?

JOHN (_lightly_). Nothing. I thought editor and contributor--

HILDEGARDE. Oh! I see.

JOHN (_stopping at door, and turning round_). Do you mean to say your