after dinner, but in view of cook's drastic alterations in the
time-table I may as well tell you (_looking round_) at once.

MRS. CULVER. It's something about the Government again.

CULVER. The Government has been in a very serious situation.

MRS. CULVER (_alarmed_). You mean they're going to ask you to resign?

CULVER. I wish they would!

MRS. CULVER. Arthur! Do please remember the country is at war.

CULVER. Is it? So it is. You see, my pet, I remember such a lot of
things. I remember that my brainy partner is counting khaki trousers in
the Army clothing department. I remember that my other partner ought to
be in a lunatic asylum, but isn't. I remember that my business is going
to the dogs at a muzzle velocity of about five thousand feet a second. I
remember that from mere snobbishness I work for the Government without a
penny of salary, and that my sole reward is to be insulted and libelled
by high-brow novelists who write for the press. Therefore you ought not
to be startled if I secretly yearn to resign. However, I shall not be
asked to resign. I said that the Government had been in a very serious
situation. It was. But it will soon recover.

MRS. CULVER. How soon?

CULVER. On New Year's Day.

JOHN. Then what's the fearful shock, dad?