By this time the waiter was furious and called the hotel proprietor,
while the guests at the nearby table looked over that way with
curious glances.

"Really, sir, this is unusual. May I ask why can't you eat any of
our soups?" demanded the proprietor.

"Because I have no spoon," replied the guest quietly.



_Why He Would Like It_

The little son of the minister, at Sunday dinner, said at the family
table:

"Father, I wish I could be 'a doorkeeper in the House of the Lord,'
as you said this morning."

"Indeed," said the minister-father, with a pleased look across the
table at his wife.

"Yes," said the boy, "for then I wouldn't have to listen to the
sermon."



_Why Mr. Duffy's Nose was Red_