_No Wonder He Asked "Why?"_

Edward had just returned from foreign service, and his brow was
troubled.

"I gave you that parrot as a birthday present, did I not, Amelia?" he
asked.

"Yes; but surely, Teddy, you are not going to speak of your tokens as
if----"

"It was young and speechless at the time."

"Yes"--with increasing wonder--"and it has never been out of this
parlor."

"There are no other young ladies in this house?"

"No; there are not."

"Then why--why, when I k-kissed your photograph in yonder album,
while waiting for you, did that wretched bird imitate your voice and
say: 'Don't do that, Herbert, please don't!'"



_The Safest Place_

A city gentleman was recently invited down to the country for "a day
with the birds." His aim was not remarkable for its accuracy, to the