_What Would Happen_

A woman agitator, holding forth on the platform and presenting the
greatness other sex, cried out: "Take away woman and what would
follow?"

And from the audience came a clear, male voice: "We would."



_Couldn't Fool Him That Far_

Years ago, when telephones were still a novelty, a farmer came to town
one day and called on a lawyer friend of his whom he supplied with
butter, and who had had a telephone recently put in his office.

"Need any butter this morning?" asked the farmer.

"Well, I don't know," answered the lawyer. "Wait a minute. I'll ask
my wife about it."

After speaking through the 'phone he went on; "No; my wife says no."

The farmer's face was a study for a moment. Then he broke out with:
"Look-a-here, Mr. Lawyer, I may be a 'Rube' and have my whiskers full
of hay and hayseed, but I'm not such a big fool as to believe that
your wife is in that box!"