passing the horse?" said an English cabman with exaggerated politeness
to the fat lady who had just paid a minimum fare, with no fee.

"Why?" she inquired.

"Because if 'e sees wot 'e's been carrying for a shilling 'e'll 'ave a
fit," was the freezing answer.



_Her Father Didn't Like It_

A young man told his girl the other night that if she didn't marry him
he'd get a rope and hang himself right in front of her house. "Oh,
please, don't do it, dear," she said; "you know father doesn't want
you hanging around here."



_He Didn't Mind His Going Once_

An elderly gentleman, a stranger in New York and not sure of his way,
stopped a young man on Fifth Avenue and said:

"Young man, I would like very much to go to Central Park."

The young man became thoughtful for a moment, and then, looking the
old gentleman in the face, said:

"Well, I don't mind your going just this once, but don't ever, ever