expense, asked him if he knew anything about astrology.

"Be jabers, no," said Pat.

"Then that's the best part of your life just lost," answered the
Englishman.

The second Englishman then asked Pat if he knew anything about
theology.

"Be jabers, no," answered Pat.

"Well," the second said, "I must say that's the very best part of
your life lost."

A few minutes later a sudden squall arose and the boat capsized. Pat
began to swim. The Britons, however, could not swim, and both called
loudly to Pat to help them.

"Do you know anything about swimology?" asked Pat.

"No," answered both Englishmen.

"Well, be jabers," replied Pat, "then both of your lives is lost!"



_Could Eat, but Couldn't See_

A farmer who went to a large city to see the sights engaged a room at