[Sidenote: A series of similes.]

However, it occurred to me to compare the discomforts and straits of
monasticism, which I feared I should be unable to support, with the
wants of those who remain in the world. Then it became clear to me that
all the joys and pleasures of the world turn to discomforts and bring
sorrow. For the world is like salt water. The more one drinks of it the
more thirsty one becomes; like a bone found by a dog on which he still
sniffs the flavour of flesh, he bites to get at it but only to tear the
flesh of his teeth and make his mouth bleed and the more he struggles
the more he makes it bleed; like the vulture that has found a piece of
flesh, it attracts other birds in a flock so that for a long time it is
in trouble and flies till at last, quite exhausted, it drops its prey;
like a pot filled with honey and with poison at the bottom, he who eats
of it has a short enjoyment but at last death by venom; like a dream
which rejoices the sleeper who finds when he awakes his joy vanished;
like lightning that brings brilliance for a moment but quickly
disappears, he who builds his hope upon it abides in darkness; like the
silk worm the more it spins itself into the silk the more impossible it
finds to come out.

[Sidenote: More internal struggle.]

After I had pondered thus I once more proposed to my soul to elect
asceticism and had yearning for it. Nevertheless I opposed it with: It
will not do that I should seek refuge from the world in asceticism when
I think of the evils of the world and then again seek refuge in the
world from asceticism when I consider the privations and discomforts of
the latter. I continued in a state of prolonged vacillation without firm
determination like the Kazi of Merv who at first heard one party and