Through the long June night on her bed in the room under the gable--the
hot room that smelt of plaster and of the apples stored in the loft
behind it--she lay thinking.

Gwinnie had turned her back, burrowing into her pillow with a final shrug
of her hips. She was asleep now in her corner.

"If I were you I wouldn't think about him, Sharlie"--She knew what
Gwinnie meant. But thinking was one thing and caring was another.
Thinking was the antidote to caring. If she had let her mind play freely
over Gibson Herbert in the beginning--But Gibson stopped her thinking,
and John Conway made her think. That was the difference.

There was nothing about John that was like Gibson. Not a look, not a
gesture, not the least thought in his mind. His mind was like his
body, clean and cold and beautiful. Set on fire only by dreams; loving
you in a dream, a dream that burned him up and left him cold to you.
Cold and clean.

There were things she laid up against him, the poor dear; a secret hoard
of grievances now clear to her in the darkness; she found herself turning
them over and over, as if positively her mind owed his romantic apathy a
grudge. Little things she remembered. Three things.

Yesterday in the hayfield, John pitching hay on to the cart, and she
standing on the top of the load, flattening down the piles as he swung
them up. Gwinnie came with a big fork, swanking, for fun, trying to pitch
a whole haycock. In the dark of the room she could see Gwinnie's little
body straining back from the waist, her legs stiffening, her face pink