Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, August 29, 1891 by Various
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page 3 of 42 (07%)
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Of course HIGLINSON should have changed his name, and should have
married. But the idiotic notions about pluck prevented him from changing his name; and he would not marry a woman who accepted him from only mercenary motives. He was so unattractive that he did not think it possible a woman would marry him for any other reason. However, he could not always be superintending the manufacture of Blacking-cream; and it was obvious to him that he could publish no more verses. So he devoted himself to philanthropy in a quiet and unostentatious way. He attempted the reclamation of street-arabs. He worked among them. He spent vast sums on providing education, training, and decent pleasures for them. A man who wrote for _The Scalpel_ found him out at last. Next day there was a pretty little paragraph in _The Scalpel_, showing Mr. HIGLINSON up, and suggesting that this was a clever attempt to get the London shoe-blacks to use HIGLINSON's Blacking-cream. The Blacking-cream, by the way, had never been advertised in _The Scalpel_. HIGLINSON was furious. He spent a little money in finding out who had written the paragraph. Then he walked up to the writer in a public street, with raised walking-stick. "Now, Sir," he said, "you shall have the thrashing that you deserve." [Illustration] But it happened that the writer was physically superior to HIGLINSON; so it was the writer who did the thrashing, and HIGLINSON who took it. Next day, _The Scalpel_ amused itself with HIGLINSON to the extent of half a column. The notice was headed:-- "MR. HIGLINSON ADVERTISES HIMSELF AGAIN." |
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