of this Work. It may be advisable to explain that these Fables are
written in the colloquial American language. The vocabulary employed
is one that has become familiar to the ear, although it is seldom seen
on the printed page. In other words, this volume contains a shameless
amount of slang. If any part of it is unintelligible to the reader, he
should be glad that he has escaped what seems to be an epidemic.

THE AUTHOR.




CONTENTS


The Periodical Souse, the Never-Again Feeling and the Ride On the
Sprinkling Cart, 13

The Kind of Music That Is Too Good for Household Use, 23

The One or Two Points of Difference Between Learning and Learning How,
26

The Night-Watch and the Would-Be Something Awful, 37

The Attenuated Attorney Who Rang In the Associate Counsel, 46

What Father Bumped Into at the Culture Factory, 54

The Search for the Right House and How Mrs. Jump Had Her Annual